LOVE

Banana Deep Conditioner Results!

My hair feels really soft!!! I don't have a great amount of curl definition, but I kind of like my hair that way anyway. Conclusion? I'll definately be doing this treatment again!

Homemade Banana Deep Conditioning Treatment

I came across this article on Beyond Black and White, and it inspired me to get in the kitchen and concoct my own homemade deep conditioning treatment. I chose to do the Banana Treatment because it was the only one in the list that I already had all of the ingredients for :). However, I did tweak the ingredients just a bit.

My Mixture

1 and 1/2 Banana (sliced)
5 Tablespoons Extra Virgin Olive Oil
3 Tablespoons Grapeseed Oil
1/2 cup water
A dash of Vegetable Glycerin and Aloe Vera Gel

I blended that bod boy together (if you don't blend there tends to be lots of banana chunks). The resulting mixture was very liquidy, but I stuck it in the fridge over night and here is my result!

It looks a lot more liquidy than it actually is. Check out that consistency:

Pretty thick! So prior to putting the banana condish on my hair, I warmed my trusty oil bottle in a bowl of hot water until it was warm. I then used the nozzle to properly oil my scalp which led to a relaxing scalp massage.

I then shampooed my hair using Herbal Essence Hello Hydration Shampoo. I hate using a towel, so I blotted my hair dry with an old t-shirt to remove excess water afterwards. I usually wash/ condition my hair in twists for several reasons.

1. My hair just doesn't feel the same if I try to wash/condition it with a regular fro. My hair doesn't feel as moisturized.
2. I want to get my scalp really clean, so twists allow me to shampoo my scalp, not my actual hair.

After my pre poo and shampoo, it's time to get to work!

I added conditioner to each twists by untwisting and then coating the strand in banana-y goodness.

And here's how they looked when I finished each strand.

Now I'm going to wait 30 mins to wash it out and then I plan on conditioning one last time with my staple cheapie V05 Moisture Milk Strawberries and Cream. Yum!

Result pics will be coming soon!

Hair Challenge

My hair has grown a lot over my year of being natural but I feel like I'm ready to take it to the next level. Maybe you'll join me?

I've decided to give myself a hair challenge in an attempt to achieve healthy, shiny, bouncy locs. And yes, I hope this will help it grow a little longer in the process. I understand that hair shininess and length is in part genetic, but there are things all curlies can do to make their hair the best it an be.

My Luscious Locs Challenge

I plan to:

• drink water with every meal (sorry cherry coke, you are no longer my staple)
• do a scalp massage every night
• eat a fruit or vegetable with every meal
• wash/ deep condition weekly

I know other hair challenges include taking a daily vitamin or exercise, but I'm trying to be as realistic as possible (baby steps my friends) and I know those don't jive with my life style.

So what about you? Are there any hair challenges you've tried or would like to?

Sorry!

I haven't been posting that often AT ALL.

Part of the reason is school work and general life business but mostly it's because I've been Tumblin'.

I used to be one of those people who thought "Tumblr? What is the point of that? It's not even a real blog!"

But now? I've fallen in love.

Tumblr is more than just pictures and random GIFs.

Tumblr is a place for the right brained. For the creative creators of the world who love life and color and love and wish to celebrate that. Tumblr reveals personalities and makes connections to friends that think and dream just like you. It's give voice to the meek. The people who walk down the halls each day and nobody notices. It's home to the loved, the lost, the believers, the painters, the artists, the depressed and oppressed. It's great. You should really get one. And explore.

Here's mine :) badahair.tumblr.com

Length Retention and Protective Styling

Sighs.

I am in love with my hair, curlies, but I've come to the realization that I'm kind of the abusive boyfriend in this analogy. I'm nice and gentle with her. I treat her to deep conditioning dates and deep scalp massages. But every now and then I get frustrated and I start to abuse her. I fall asleep without twisting her ( a big no no for me it gets really tangled) or instead of slowly untwisting my twists from the bottom up, I rip them apart from the top down. (And yes sometimes I even hear that sickening RIIIIIP!)

So today is the day where I'm making a public declaration of love to my hair in hopes that she'll forgive me and give me another chance.

From now on, I vow to:

1. Treat my hair to yummy deep conditioning treatments on a regular basis.
2. not be lazy and co-wash daily or at the most every other day (she is happiest when I do this)
3. Seal and Untwist my ends with oil dipped finger tips
4. More Scalp Massages
5.No more ripping my twists apart in the morning! I will be more gentle!
6. To do more protective styling/ low manipulation


I have a problem with protective styling. The problem is I don't really do it unless I have some form of weave in. My hair isn't long enough and is too thick anyways for a pony tail or bun or any other style that I've seen where you can tuck the ends of your hair away. So I'm more of a low manipulation style girl. But sometimes I forget the "low manipulation" part of the style and I constantly twist/'un twist my hair. As a result I only see lots of hair growth/length retention after a long period of wearing weave. Which sucks.

So I researched some styles that are great for protecting the hair. Unfortunately they seem to include:

• Buns (which I can't do yet)
• Twists (Which I am doing and don't seem to be working)
• Flat twists (Ditto)
• Weaves

Ahhh! Any advice? What is your choice protective style or some of the vows you've made to your lovely locks?

:P

My Chunkier Twist Out Results

I said in an earlier post that I wanted to do a twist out with bigger chunks o hair so that my resulting hair do would be less defined and more fluffy. So here is the result!

Sorry for the bathroom pics lol. I get the best lighting in their tho!

For my chunky twist out I didn't add any more product onto my hair because it was already pretty moisturized. I never really part my hair I just grab chunks and twist. I've been flat twisting the front of my hair to one side to make a kind of part and to keep certain strands from sticking straight up as my hair is sometimes prone to do.

At night I have a satin scarf I wrap around my head (just to keep the twists from sticking up all weird in the morning) and in the morning I just spray my hair lightly with my leave in concoction for a boost of moisture.

And voila! Chunky Twist Out! By far my favorite style thus far.

What are some of your favorite natural styles?

:P



Bad Kitty

HI! The polyvore outfits are back and I've decided to only use pieces from stores with affordable clothing from now on lol. I hope you like!

Bad Kitty by collegenerd featuring metal jewelry

BKE long top
$8.04 - buckle.com

Wet Seal halter vest
$20 - wetseal.com

Wet Seal leopard print skirt
$17 - wetseal.com

Wet Seal disco jewelry
$13 - wetseal.com

Wet Seal polka dot jewelry
$7.50 - wetseal.com

Wet Seal metal jewelry
$6.50 - wetseal.com

Wet Seal wool fedora hat
$13 - wetseal.com

Music Obsession

I less than 3 Corinne Bailey Rae! All of her songs are noms but this one has been stuck in my head a lot lately so here ya go!

New Pics!

So I took my yarn braids out as I said before and I did a twist out and here is the result.

Ugh such a stupid picture. Sorry I suck at it.

Here is a closer look at the twist out. My hair had mad definition.

Here I am showing how long my hair really is. I know some naturals don't like stretching their hair to see how long it has gotten. But I do so nyah. Also my hair shrinks like crazy so it is a better indicator of how much my hair has grown.

Another Stupid picture

AAaaaand another stupid picture. I dunno why my lips look like that. They look weird.

So that's my resulting twist out. Next time I want to do bigger chunks of hair. I did really little twists all over my head last time and it not only took forever but... I didn't get the lovely fluffy afro that I desired sooo better luck next time.I did achieve awesome curl definition, though. So that's a plus.

Oh yeah, here is what I used:

Prepoo- Mixture of Olive, Coconut, and Grapeseed oils

Shampoo- Herbal Essence Hello Hydration

Deep Conditioner- Organic Root Stimulator Olive Oil Replenishing Conditioner

Styling: (in order of use)

Hawaiian Silky 14-n-1 Miracle Worker

Shea Moisture Curl Enhancing Smoothie

Oil Mixture mentioned above

Stay Curly!

Natural. Kinky. Curly Hair=...?

the tree is blending perfectly with the afro lol i thought it was kinda cool

I'm tired dorm room curlies. Tired of hearing black people equate natural hair with bad hair. I know. I know. Good hair = Healthy hair, no matter what texture it is. But some people still have the mentality that India Arie talks about: "good hair means curls and waves/bad hair means you look like a slave" (I Am Not My Hair).

I can't count how many times I've heard people say that they can't go natural because they have "bad hair" or that they hope their kids don't have "bad hair" or that I'm lucky because my boyfriend's white so our future children won't have "bad hair".

All of the above typically are using "bad hair" to mean kinky hair. Hair that isn't straight, curly, wavy, but are of the dreaded kink variety.

Personally I WANT my kids to have kinky hair. I have so much versatility with my lovely kinks that I want my daughter or son to have fun experimenting with theirs just like their mommy does.

I don't understand why this "bad hair" thing is still perpetuated even within the natural community. I know people who relentlessly search and research the different hair types (the whole 3a, 3b, 4a etc). They have this dread that their hair will fall under the 4a, 4b category because that is the bad, kinky hair category. Some even deny their own hair, claiming that it is really 3a, 3b, 3c.

ALL hair has the potential to be beautiful hair if you keep it healthy, no matter what the texture, length, color, or curl pattern!

That's why I'm going to add a new feature on my blog dedicated to celebrating all hair types and textures. Because natural hair IS Bad. Super Bad A$$ :)

Yarn Braid Update

It's official! The yarn braids are out after a month and some change.

I didn't take them out for any bad reason. I loved the yarn braids because they were:

• light and easy to style
• kept my hair insanely moisturized all the time
• were a great wake up and go style

The only downside I can think of is that when I washed it (once every week to week and a half) it took ALL DAY to dry, even when I wrung the braids out.

BUT that's not the reason I took them out. I took them out because I missed my curlies soooo badly! There are a lot more natural girls on campus this year and just seeing them out rocking their hair made me miss my lovely curls. So I said buh bye to the yarn braids in a process that took two days (ugh). But I'm happy. She's washed, conditioned, and ready for pics once I figure out what style I want her in.

Stay curlie :)



Color Issues

This one is going to be a quickie because I have homework pouring out of my ears. So I was on BeyondBlackandWhite and I read this article about Snoop's poor baby girl getting trash talked due to her weight and the hue of her skin.

I understand that not every dark skinned girl/woman/female is cute but neither is every light skinned girl/woman/female. I can't pass the paper bag test to save my life, and I personally get sick of guys telling me that I look pretty "for a dark girl" (*side eye....* how am I supposed to answer that exactly? I don't feel that you merit a thank you...)

From my experience (and from other commenter's experiences) it is mainly black men and women who have a problem with a black girl being dark skinned. A lot of black people show a dislike for black features. They will ridicule a fellow black person for having dark skin, kinky hair, big lips, a flat nose, etc. But as another commenter on the site stated, this is true in other races as well. It is just an ugly cycle of self hatred that goes on in different racial communities, not just the black ones.

Anyways. This poor girl has lupus, so her weight may be due to side effects from her medications. I hate it when people comment on another's person's weight anyway. (oooh girl she is too big she needs to put down that hamburger) or (oooh girl she is too skinny she needs to pick up a hamburger). In either situation it is A) none of your business and B) ridiculously disgusting and rude to comment on it. Every big person does not have an eating problem and every small person is not anorexic.

Well that is my bit. Have any of you ever been treated differently due to your weight or skin color? Don't hesitate :)

The Differences in Natural Oils

Picture By: netsnake

While reading different natural hair care blogs and websites you might notice that each writer or subscriber has different preferences of oil. Some praise coconut oil, others olive or argon. The reality is that all of these oils are great sealants (oil is NOT a moisturizer!) for natural hair. But there are little differences about these oils that may be helpful to some new or even veteran curlies.

1. Extra Virgin Olive Oil

Extra Virgin Olive Oil (commonly referred to as EVOO) is the mega oil. You will hear a lot of positive things about it on various blogs because it can do so much!

Consistency:

This oil is heavier in consistency than other oils, so heavy handed people beware. A little really goes a long way, so don't be tempted to use too much while sealing or styling. This is also another benefit of olive oil. Using a little each time you do your hair will make it last a long time. I'm all about saving money.

Benefits:

Like I said, it is the mega oil. EVOO seals in moisture, is great when added to deep conditioners (or on its own for a hot oil treatment) and it both prevents split ends and improves the strength of the hair. Conditioning? Strengthens? What does that equal? Hair Growth Babeh.

2. Virgin Coconut Oil

Coconut oil is another favorite in the natural community. Beware that all coconut oil is not created equal. The best kinds are usually more expensive and it is best to get it online or from a health food store. And don't fall for cheap products in the hair stores with a huge Coconut Oil label on the front. Read the ingredients. It's 90% petroleum and fragrance. Not the best quality.

Consistency:

Coconut Oil is kinda weird because it is solid at room temperature, but when melted slightly, it is a very light oil. A little goes a long way with this oil and the lightness prevents it from weighing down you hair when used in moderation. Because this product is solid at room temperature, some naturals find it easier to use for sealing/stylig and for deep conditioning treatments since it is not as messy as oils in their liquid form.

Benefits:

Coconut oil smells better than most oils naturals use on their hair. This may not be a big thing for some, but others prefer a sweet smelling oil over the not so sweet smell of others. It also is great for dry hair because it conditions and penetrates the hair shaft well. It is also another oil that strengthens the hair which means less breakage/split ends.

3. Grapeseed Oil

Now this oil is my personal favorite on the list. I used this oil to seal my freshly conditioned hair along with my Shea Moisture Curl Enhancing Smoothie. The result was ridiculous moisture. My hair felt better than it had my entire natural life.

Consistency:

Light. This oil is super light and you only need a little to properly sel your hair.

Benefits:

There are many benefits of grape seed oil use. The first is that is is odorless, so if you don't like the smell of olive or coconut oil, then grapeseed oil is a smart alternative. This oil works as a heat protectant for naturals who may blowdry or flat iron their hair from time to time. The hair shaft absorbs grape seed oil much faster than heavier oils and is great for deep conditioning or hot oil treatments. It strengthens, adds shine, and once again- it is good for hair growth.

I will do a part two of this post soon because that is all I have time to do now. (I've got stacks on stack of homework lol). But what are some of your favorite oils curlies?

Much Love :)

Whatcha Man Gotta Do With Me?

Picture by: Sam Howzit

Men. They come in all shapes, colors, sizes and levels of maturity. And with a variation of lame or stupid pick up lines.

Men, while approaching a lady (not a female, a lady) and expressing interest, if the young lady replies that she has a boyfriend/fiance/husband DO NOT reply with: "Whatcha man gotta do with me?" or "What does that have to do with me and you?" or "So? This is college."

You're already showing your lack of respect for monogamous relationships and therefore any decent woman will immediately lose interest.

Or perhaps you're not even looking for a decent woman which is why you thought that line would work?

Ladies have you had experiences with lame or inappropriate pick up lines?

:)

Long Distance Dating in College

Picture By: zoetnet

College life is great. You meet a lot of cool people and learn all kinds of interesting things. But something that could put a slight  (or major) damper on your college experiences is doing it without your number one partner in crime by your side.

With 4,186 different colleges and universities in the United States, the chances of you and your current or potential beau attending the same college may be slim.

However, with new and rising technologies it's quite possible to maintain a happy, healthy relationship when the love of your life is away- be it 1 hour or 20.

1. Set Boundaries/ Establish Trust

The very first thing to do when beginning a long term relationship is to make sure you trust each other and that you know what pushes the others buttons. Establishing some rules does not mean you don't trust your partne. It's just a way to ensure that the pair of you are on the same page as far as what constitutes as cheating or what you would be uncomfortable with.

Different people and couples have varying beliefs about cheating. Some couples think texting another girl/boy constantly is cheating while others agree that only sexual physical contact is off limits. The important thing is for a long distance couple is to explain what makes each of you uncomfortable in an open, calm, non-accusatory way so that there is no confusion/accusations down the line.

Once the rules are set, you have to trust that your partner will stick by them. Trust is a huge part of any relationship, and if you feel as if you can't trust your boyfriend/girlfriend, then you need to go ahead and have that conversation as well.

2. Cell Phones vs. Text Messaging

Thanks to the use of cell phones, it's common for couples in college to communicate by talking on the phone or texting. Some people dislike texting as a way to get in contact with their mate because:

• messages can be misconstrued or misinterpreted
• they feel it is impersonal
• they are too busy to text constantly
• they would rather hear a voice than a text tone.

Despite this, some couples don't mind maintaining conversations through text:

• you are able to do homework/watch tv/hang out while texting
• you can have constant communication throughout the day instead of an hour conversation before bed.

In reality it is really up to you and your boyfriend/girlfriend and whatever the pair of you are comfortable with. Some couples talk on the phone once a week while others text all day. Either one is normal and acceptable as long as you both are happy with it.



3. Video Chat

Video chatting is a great way to talk to your partner if hearing their voice over the phone just isn't enough. It's popular for those in long distance relationships who just want some face time.


Do you guys know any other cool ways to keep in contact with your partner or do you have any more tips? Feel free to comment! :)

 

Youtube Obsession!!!

Thanks NappySexyFly for posting these videos or else I never would have found them. These really show off the beauty of natural hair.

Subscribe! I know I am lol.

Who Wears Short Shorts?: Racial Double Standards

Photo By: Jemingway

Sorry guys. It's the best pic I can find wihtout being overtly gross. And I was going to find a pic to use (preferably for free) of a black girl in shorts and have you compare the two photos. However I don't think there are many pics of black women on the internet that are both free to use and non pornographic. (seriously I googled free pics of black women (okay in hindsight it sounds stupid) but I got several porn sites in return.)

I've notived the double standard of black/white girl codes of dress. Most commonly (from my eperiences, anyway) tis deals with shorts, skirts, any type clothing that reveals the legs. It's unfortunately really common for people to disapprove of a black woman wearing short shorts, short skirts, etc., while white women often do with no reperussions. No one says they look like a ho or that they should cover up.

A friend of mine stated that this was the same way in her high school. The black girls in her school were told to go home or that they need to change if they are seen wearing shorts or skirts at school, while non black students were allowed full freedom of dress. One teacher stated that this rule was because non black students "had more curvacious figures" than their black peers, and therefore was less of a threat to disrupting education.

I call BS on the whole thing. I'm black. I have little to no curves as is the case for many black girls/women. And yet we still don't have free license as far as dress wihtout getting the side eye.

I believe this standard goes even farther than trendy clothing. This has alot to do with how black women are and have been portrayed for a very long time. Black women are viewed as un-feminine sex objects, therefore we are taught that we are not as appealing as our non black counterparts, and are not granted the same benefit of being thought of as innocent until proven slutty.

This topic remind me of an article on Beyond Black & White, where the author Christelyn Karazin explains why she doesn't believe black women can participate in the feminist movement of the Slut Walk in the same way that a white woman can. The Slut Walk movement is an attempt to 'shock' society by showing womn of all races marching down the street in scantily clad wear.

While this may jerk at the hearts of those who view non black women as innocent, pure, and virginal. What will it say about black women who have never had the privilage of being thought as such? The jist of this is that since black women are already viewed as sluts, hos, tricks etc., there will be no shock value from seeing a black woman struttin' down the street in lingerie. That simply would be reinforcing the already overdone stereotype of the oversexualized black woman. Kind of counterproductive for a feminist movement.

I've even heard people say (when I bring up this argument randomly) that white women are just allowed to wear these things because when black girls do it it's probably to gain male attention. (This person was not black.)

I guess I can see this point because I know quite alot of thirsty, fresh, hot, and whatever other slang term to mean just plain FAST girls around campus who actually do dress for male attention. And these people may be getting their information from various rap videos or club visits.
Whatever.

 But to assume the entire black female population are wearing shorts or skirts to gain a man is insulting and racist and just plain stupid. I wear shorts/skirts/dresses because I live in the south and it's 90-100 degrees and I just refuse to be uncomfortable in that kind of heat and I don't give a rats balls what guy looks or doesn't look because I don't value myself based on that.

So what about you guys? Have you gotten side eyes for your choice of dress while surrounded by non blacks who are doing the same? What are your experiences with Racial Double Standards?

Don't hesitate :)



Blogs I'm Obsessed With

Photo By: Rob Pearce

There are times when you're thinking something random or you're feeling some type of way and a friend says exactly what you're thinking and feeling at the moment.

It's the "That's what I'm talkin bout!" moment that people often share and relish in. The acknowledgement that you are not the only human being in the world with this particular pet peeve o thought or belief.

With that being said, I've recently found some great women who are bloggers and I CANT STOP READING their posts. I honestly think I've read every article on each of their sites. I hope I can be as good as them one day but sometimes I get a bit spazzish as I write and I'm not sure if my point is getting across. (Maybe you've noticed? Lol).

But anyways I was doing random link clickage starting at BitchMedia which led me to Blogher which led me to Yes, We're Together. That blog site led me to Beyond Black & White and then on that site I found Living Single and Christian and finally that site led me (somehow I don't quite remember lol) to Politically Unapologetic. All of these links lead to many great, smart female writers so feel free to click away and mention who sent you their way. :)



Booquisha?

It's late.

I have class in the morning.

But I had to hop out of bed as soon as I heard this. I'm flipping through channels and I land on Lifetime and see yet another stage mom show. This time it's Abbey Lee's Dance Company show and cool we'll see how this goes.

One of the dance moms, Holly, the only black one, s a little black girl in the dance crew, and she is offended that her daughter's costume is the only animal print one. Okay I can see the offensiveness there.
But then the Company director (Abbey Lee I guess). asked her to have an afro for the performance.

I can kind of see the offense in that. Maybe the mom thought her daughter would be the object of ridicule being the only brown girl with afro hair. But Holly's reaction was uncalled for none the less.

"I'm not Booquisha! We don't wear afros!"

Now that was offensive. Afro does NOT equal ghetto. And to have a black woman say so is even more so offensive. Honey we know what you and your daughter's hair looks like without a perm. An it ain't straight.

She goes on to complain to the white Dance moms about how black people have "worked so hard to get past all that, It's the 21st century"

Get past what exactly? Our own blackness? The soft, beautiful, versatile hair that God blessed us with?

You're right Dance Mom Holly. It is the 21st century. So time to get rid of your hangups and get with the natural movement. Maybe the Dance Lady wanted you daughter to have an afro to Celebrate the difference between her and the other girls.

And maybe you should learn to celebrate black hair too.

I AM ASHAMED

GROOOOOOOOOOOOOSSSSSS!!!

Sorry if you couldn't get through a full four minutes of that. But I just had to write about it.

This. Is. Ridic.

There is not enough money in the world to make me do anything like this (not that I could move like that anyway lol) but still. Black women participating in things like this is what sets us back. It's what makes guys call us slurs rather than names. And people just accept it. SMDH!!!

Rap Video Girls!

I don’t have to point out the disgusting image of black women that is portrayed by the rap community (and yes, I know it’s not all of them but A LOT of them). I mean just look at the video. It says it all. 

 And women claim to like and accept this music despite the message because they ‘like the beat’Is this how girls run the world? Running what exactly? How can you be empowered as a woman while accepting that the culture most popular with black men says you’re best suited on your back or on your knees?

And men are sold this kind of lifestyle because it appeals to them. A life of being rich and getting hoes probably sounds a hell of a lot better than the situation a lot of young black men are in. So they become fed this sense of entitlement that that is the life they deserve and therefore those types of females (note I didn’t say WOMEN) are those that they deserve.

And what do black women do to retaliate? Do we band together and as one fight this objectification of women?

Nope.

A lot of women would rather conform to the idea of what a bad man (not necessarily a black man because there are rotten bananas in each bunch) than lose the chance to be in a relationship.

You can’t simultaneously beg for better treatment and accept bullshit at the same time.

Youtube Obsession

The 7th episode is finally here.


The Misadventures of An Awkward Black Girl

Click it.

Now.

Penis on a Pedestal?

Picture by: terren in Virginia

And the winner is....?

I live in the south. And a lot of people have their own personal opinions about interracial relationships. Specifically MY interracial relationship.

My boyfriend is white and I'm obviously black and I've written about certain annoyances we've encountered just because we're not the same skin tone. And I understand the historical reasons why some people don't agree with interracial relationships, but those reasons can be just as stupid or hurtful as anything else.

But I've found myself meeting a strange reaction from some black women that I find just as taxing as the free love haters. Of course there are lots of african american women who feel as if any relationship that is not black on black is wrong, but alot of the time I get this reaction:

"You date a white boy? For REAL? How can I get one?"

or

"You need to train ME on how to get one!"

Sighs.

Are white men really such a commodity that some women feel as if it is a sign of 'coming up' if you get a white man to be interested in you? I honestly don't think so. I love my babe to death bt if I'd met a black, hispanic, asian, purple, green, blue man who matched me as perfectly as he did prior to our dating relationship, then I would be with them. My attraction has nothing to do with his skin tone but whats inside him is what atracts me the most.

And it perplexes (and worries) me that soem black women actually believe that by dating outside theri race, they will actually find a man that deserves them and will treat them right. White guys cheat and abuse just like black does, hispanic, asian, etc guys do and it has nothing to do with skin tone but the hurtful and hateful person inside of them.

Another reason this worries me because that whole white man can do know wrong mentality is what alot of black women who see the beauty in interracial relationships are bombarded with from family members and others in the black community. The disgusting accusation that because a black woman is with a white man (or any other race than black) is because she secretly or outwardly hates black men and believes that other races are superior. Maybe some black woman actually feel this way, but that is not the case with me and I'm sure a number of women don't agree with that either.

So my question is why do some women put certain men on a pedestal? This doesn't have to just be about white men, but any race of man. I hate the whole 'my (insert race her) man is better thn yours because (insert stereotype here). So be honest and do NOT be hurtful while commenting because like it or not, Love knows no race.

:)



Transitioning Styles

This one is for my lovely suite mate Shanice who is currently transitioning from relaxed to natural and is having some trouble with styling.

But first!!! Some back ground information.


Transitioning in the natural community is a term often used to describe the process of growing out one's permed hair and cutting it gradually rather than cutting their hair off all at once.

This process can be difficult for a lot of naturals because the line at which the permed hair and new natural hair meet is a very fragile area and there can be lots of breakage as a result.

With that being said it's difficult to find hairstyles that will both protect the transitioning hair from breakage as well as make the two textures blend and look uniform since half the hair is curly while the other is straight.

1. Cornrows

This transitioning style is a good one since cornrows usually allows for hair protection and both textures are able to work with this hairstyle. A word of caution goes with this hair style choice. If the cornrows are done too tightly, then it can do more harm than good. Also some naturals may not like how cornrows look on them.

2.Bantu Knots

This is a good style for both transitioning and current naturals since it allows the ends of our hair to be tucked away which will reduce breakage. Some naturals have and easier time with this than others and the ability to do this depends on hair length (if I'm wrong feel free to correct me). But the style is cute and unique if done right, and you can even do a Bantu knot out, which is like a twist out, but the resulting curl is different and much looser.

3. Weaves!!!!!!!
Lol a lot of naturals go for this option when transitioning because there are so many different options to go with. You can do sew ins or microbraids (though be cautious of tight braiding and edge breakage) or boxbraids- any kind of weave style you can think of. This style choice can be good, since the ends are hidden and therefore protected, which reduces breakage. I would advise you to do your research before you get anything done. I'm not only talking about making sure your hairdresser is certified but also finding out the best ways to care for your natural or transitioning hair while it is in this style as far as washing, conditioning, and maintaining the look.


What are your favorite transitioning styles?

Everyone Likes Me (and other lies I told myself in highschool)

i dunno why i chose balloons

This piece is not a pity piece though I understand that the title may be misleading. It's not one of those annoying articles where the girl  goes "Oh! I'm so ugly and unpopular! Somebody please comment and tell me otherwise!" The truth is I don't believe either of those things and it's not because I'm conceited but because I know exactly who and what I am. Which brings me to the first thing on my list:

1. I know exactly who and what I am

I understand that there are some people who feel like they know who they are and what they want at age 16, 18..21....whatever. But I'm just not that person. Sure I know and understand somethings about myself but I'm only 20 years old. My brain hasn't even fully developed yet and I'm definitely not done maturing, but in high school I thought I was. I'm sure plenty of young girls feel that same way. You get one grade closer to college freedom and they think they know everything and more than everyone. You're one hundred percent sure that you want to be a model, actress, hairstylist, scientist, engineer when you get older. Your style is indie chic with a single dread or pink streak in the front of your head to show everyone you're an individual and you're damn sure not gonna change anytime soon.

But it's not true. Most college students change their majors at least once and lots of people who decide college is not their ideal life path find that they become interested in new things as they grow.

Me? I've known I've wanted to be a writer since elementary school and that's about the only thing that has remained the same. My ambitions, clothes, beliefs have changed so often since then. And not that I was being untrue to who I was or "fake" as the young kids say. But I believe each phase was just a little piece of who I actually am. For example I used to think that I was shy and quiet only to realize my Sophomore year of college that I'm quite opinionated and outspoken. Sure at times I'm still shy but it's no longer something I would label myself as since it doesn't happen as frequently.

 So will I ever know and understand each piece that makes up the puzzle of me? No. I don't think I will and I kind of like it that way. Take THAT high school me.

2. Everyone Likes Me

This next number kind of goes hand in hand with the first. Since I've explored many different aspects of my personality, I've found myself in a wide range of different groups of people who I could identify myself with at the time. That being said I've always had at least one close friend in my life with lots of associates, and honestly, that's okay with me. I'd much rather have a single best friend than a thousand facebook ones.

Anyway, I'm not sure how i happened. I guess I've always been pretty well liked and I never stepped on anyones toes on purpose, therefore at some point I got it into my head that everyone likes me. Imagine my surprise when people tell me that so and so thinks I'm stuck up or the old playground accusation of "she thinks she's allll that!". Even in college some of my friends have told me that when they first saw me they thought I might be prissy and a little stuck up.

I'm not sure how anyone got these ideas even now. I don't talk about myself or my goals excessively and even so a lot of these people make this assumption based on my appearance which I think is kind of stupid. I try to appear put together and confident because I am. That doesn't mean I'm stuck up. But I digress. My point is (trust me there is one haha) that everyone is not going to like you and the more people you meet and the more friends you make the more people you're going to piss off. Sometimes for doing nothing at all. But the important thing is for you to be okay with that. I know some friends who thrive off the approval of others. But as long as you're happy with yourself you really shouldn't care. Ugh That didn't sound too cheesy did it?

3. Keeping it Real Doesn't Mean be a Douche 

I would love to say that this one doesn't apply to me and it was really my ex best friend who everyone hated and grew up ugly and hunchbacked, but the truth is in high school it Was me. I wasn't exactly the 'mean girl' because I was a nerd so what could I do? But I was pretty mean to people I thought were beneath me by being not as smart or ugly or whatever I was against that day.

Thankfully I'm not that way now and I honestly did it to make myself feel better. But I've found that some college aged people and even those who are older have yet to learn this particular lesson. There is a distinct difference between being 'real' and being 'an asshole'. I hope no one gets offended by my language I'm really not a sailor but I feel the word fits here. Being 'real' does not mean you whisper to your friends that the girl across the lunchroom looks like a fat cow. That's called being rude.

Being real is telling your friends she has a booger hanging out of her nose or that her boobs pop out too much in her dress. Being real is saying what you feel in your heart like 'Twilight is a stupid series and pickles are gross' as opposed to pretending to like Twilight or pickles.

Talking about people behind their backs or acting like a douche bag does not make you a real it just makes you a horrible person.

Super Natural vs. Tales of a DRC

Aww isn't she cute? I was thinking of changing my blog title to Super Natrural!!! (get it lol I'm a dork). But I'm not sure if I want to change the name/logo at all. I kind of like 'Tales of a Dorm Room Curly'. The title is meant to sound like 'Tales of a Fourth Grade Nothing' (Am I the only one who loved that book as a kid?) Anyway, 'Tales of a Dorm Room Curly' might be a kind of hard title for people to remember so I just wondered what you guys thought? Super Natural or Tales of a Dorm Room Curly?

Any feedback is appreciated!!

:)

Money Saving Tips for the Frugal College Curly

Me dabbling in photography

I've written articles before about how to save money on college textbooks. But this blog isn't just for curlies in college, but for curlies who need to save a buck as well lol.

I know al ot of people are turned off by the idea of natural hair because they feel it is too expensive and taking care of straighter hair is just less work/time/effort/money. But curly veterans know that this simply isn't true. Please don't fall for the sites that tell you that individuals with natural hair can only use the most expensive products. Natural hair can be just as happy and healthy with these simple tips.

1. Buy the cheapie products.

I know different naturals like different things. Some like super thick conditioners others don't care. Some only want sulfate free shampoos while others prefer to co-wash. Whatever your preference I'm sure you can find a cheap product that will float your boat. Here is a list of some curly favorites for cheap shampoos/conditioners that get the job done:

Herbal Essence's Hello Hydration Shampoo

Herbal Essence's Hello Hydration Conditioner

Aussie Moist Conditioner

Garnier Fructis Triple Nutrition Conditioner

VO5 Moisture Milk Strawberries and Cream

Trader Joe's Refresh Citrus Shampoo

2. Another tip on how to stretch a dollar is to stretch your amount of product. You can always add natural oils or honey to your conditioners in order to make them last a little longer. These items also give your products an extra boost so that although cheap, they'll still work great. Just be sure to use oils that will actually penetrate your hair shaft. Some examples of these are:

Extra Virgin Olive Oil

Coconut Oil

Grapeseed Oil

Jojoba Oil

3. My third and final tip is to DIY. Do it yourself.  I know plenty of women in the african american community who spend hundreds of dollars on their hair. I understand that juggling jobs, children, and alone time can be taxing and some people do not posses the skill needed to deal with their own hair. It just seems so much easier to have somebody else do it. But it never hurts to try. Try doing something new or different to your hair. You might surprise yourself with what you can actually accomplish on your own.

I also know some people worry about 'messing their hair up'. But I've found that doing your own hair allows you to figure out what your hair likes, which in turn will even help you communicate with your hairdresser better about what you need.